If you had a friend who had experienced multiple pregnancy losses and desperately wanted another baby, how you would you tell her YOU were pregnant??
I am NOT pregnant, but I have a feeling that in a few months I could be and I realized I'm hesitating, in part, because I don't want to hurt her by getting pregnant before she has a healthy pregnancy.
She is a VERY VERY GOOD friend and I would do anything not to hurt her. She reads over at "the other place" so she knows we are thinking of having another baby. But, when it happens, how do I tell her without breaking her heart?
She's extremely sensitive to pregnancy announcements lately, and I don't blame her. I just don't want to hurt her.
WWYD?
4 comments:
OH SO HARD. I never know what to do, either. I have a good friend who's childless and has had miscarriages, and I feel so crappy when I tell her, "Wooo, good news, I'm expecting AGAIN!"
I don't know. I think the main thing is to let her know that you understand so she doesn't feel like she has to fake anything, you know? And not, like, COMPLAIN about being pregnant to her.
I think it is normal for women to feel jealous and angry when others are getting to have a baby and they can't for whatever reason. I think that if you tell her in a sensitive manner, acknowleging that while she might be hurt/angry, it is not really with you, just with her situation, that all will be as ok as it can be. This is really something for her to work out. Your role is just to balance being supportive and sensitive while enjoying your own pregnancy.
i'm with jess... maybe break it to her in as calm a way as possible (like, not jumping up and down and squealing) and let her know you realize it's probably a little weird for her and you will be fine with any reaction she has. basically let her know she's allowed to feel whatever she feels, and that you don't expect all! super! happy! excitement! from her at all times?
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